“Breastfeeding is not a natural act, no”: Breastfeeding Journey
Nisha Srinivasan worked as a litigator in Mumbai, India for a couple of years before moving to Melbourne, Australia, after getting married. She found it difficult to find employment there for a couple of years. Six months after finding a job as a legal secretary, Nisha discovered she was pregnant. She worked till the end of 8 months pregnancy and began her maternity leave for a year. Nisha rejoined employment when her son was 11 months old. She is also a moderator at one of the largest Facebook breastfeeding support groups, Breastfeeding Support for Indian Mothers (BSIM). 1. In India, in lot of cases, there is always a fight as to what the baby’s first drop of milk will be – breast milk or formula. How different was it for you since your son was born in Melbourne? The midwife took matters in her hands before I could even let the long 38 hour journey of labor that led to the birth sink in. “He must be tired and hungry!”, she said and helped me latch on the baby for the first time and it felt surreal honestly. The midwife in the next shift was even more amazing. She encouraged me to feed when all I wanted to do was forget the pain and just sleep. Constantly motivated me by saying that I was doing a good job. I was very thankful for the support the midwives and nurses provided me; they always encouraged me to breastfeed. However, upon our return home latching went all awry and a nurse on a visit to my home recommended nipple shields. My only real struggle in breastfeeding was using nipple shields because my son wouldn’t latch properly. It gave me such relief that I wondered why dint everyone use them. That’s when I started reading a lot on breastfeeding and especially the shields. I read shields caused the transfer of the milk to be much lower. Prolonged feedings and disproportionate supply for the baby’s demand which would lead to slow weight gain and low pee output were some disadvantages. When my son was 10 days old, I made an appointment at with a Lactation Counsellor (LC) . The latch improved briefly, but it went back to square one pretty soon. We found out much later that my son had severe tongue, cheek and lip ties which prevented him from latching on properly. We ultimately had the ties reversed at 18 months but by then breastfeeding with nipple shields had become the norm. It was either feeding with the shields, or not at all for us. At 2+ years, we still use them. I read everything I could on the pros and cons of a shield. But determined that if I were to breastfeed, this is probably our normal. If I were to breastfeed another baby, I would probably try a lot harder before letting the shields become normal for us. 2. Breastfeeding is not a cakewalk for everybody. It takes a lot of determination and patience. Although, by now you have made peace with your ‘normal’, did you ever feel like giving up? My breastfeeding journey has been full of support of my husband, family and various care providers. I wasn’t a part of BSIM till much later in my journey and my son was already 7 months by then. It was only KellyMom to dispel any doubts that I had. I did flirt with the idea of formula because it was the norm in our families, maybe due to lack of knowledge. But my local health care providers kept saying “put the baby on the breast”. The difficulty lies in the mindsets of the people around the mum and dad. They are going to listen to all advice others have to offer as vulnerable and overwhelmed parents. The USP of formula is such a comfort that it’s crazy – selling sleep for over tired parents and particularly mums, and saying the formula has this, that and the other benefits and nutrients – the advertising also fools people. Sleeplessness can do weird things to a person! In such times of frustration, a sneaky voice says, “so, options other than lying down on your side and letting child nurse quietly and self-going to sleep include…. patting, rocking, screaming, swaying, singing, walking… umm no thank you!” So, there was no giving up whatsoever! For various reasons, a lot of women across the world want to give up. Women, as a whole, are not made to have self-confidence in their ability to nurse. And, I believe it’s important to seek help. Breastfeeding is not a natural act, no. Unless given a fair go, it will not simply happen. 3. At what point in your breastfeeding journey did you need to look out for more support through support groups? How did you become a moderator on BSIM? It only happened by accident. I was on another mother’s group and was suggesting something related to breastfeeding to someone. Someone posted a link to the BSIM group. And I was surprised that there are groups that provide such particular support! I was only ever a part of the one group before. Although I had crossed mostly all initial struggles and had nothing to ask for myself, I felt the urge to help mums who were fortunate to be in this group seeking support. I became a Peer Counsellor (PC) in around 2 weeks of joining (I was forever trolling the group!). And was given moderatorship in September 2016. I would like to thank the admin and mod team for the help, support and fun we have. And for making friends with people I haven’t met and yet share a deep ever-lasting bond! Also, a note of gratitude to the PCs who make it so much easier on the admin and mod team! A vote of thanks to the members who express gratitude to our efforts! We note the gratitude and return with thanks! 4. You went back to work
